It's unbearably slow at work right now, and all this time to do nothing but read about other people's adventures makes me even more stir crazy. It's not like I'm having an existential crisis, by any means, I'm just bored.
It's becoming a regular occurrence that I wonder what's next, or if I'm doing what I should be... but it's not such a strong feeling that I feel like I should just throw everything out the window and start over. It's more like those times when I was in college or high school when I thought to myself "this isn't fun, but I'm going to be so involved in something else later that I won't even remember now" or it's like when you have an argument with someone and a couple years down the road you don't remember anything about it other than being angry for some reason.
And so.
I'd like a fast forward button.
I'm thinking about changing fields. Right field is ok, I'm (Old) Eric Davis. What if I want to be Tony Gwynn? Maybe I want to be Gary Carter. Who knows? I need a fast forward button. Enough talking in baseball players.
I suppose the question is "what exactly would I be doing if I could be doing anything?" and the answer is "fuck if I know."
I suppose you could spend your whole life worrying about making a bad step.
How about you? If you could be doing anything, what is it that you'd be doing? If it was just you, with nothing to tie you down, no house payment, no kids, no crippling drug habit, no colostomy bag... NOW WHAT?
Sorry about your colostomy bag,
Mike
3 comments:
Man, I know exactly how you feel. Sucks. But to answer your question, I would want to have some kind of job where I get paid to travel around and see lots of things. I wouldn't care what the work was. As long as I got to travel.
I alternate between wanting to live in some small desert town like Kanab, Utah and open up an outdoor goods shop and just hike everywhere I can with little care for material goods or wealth. Or living in Paris and taking all the wealth I can find and live a life of high sophistication.
I'm schizo.
i can definitely see a little of myself in what both of you have said; i just want to be retired and free to work when i feel like it or when i'm bored, and even then it'd just be work like organizing kids soccer leagues or something.
something nice and boring.
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