have you heard the one about fulham's defense?

This weekend was uneventful, with the highlight being a trip to Greenwood mall. Here's a tip for anyone reading: if the highlight of your weekend is a trip to a mall, consider shooting yourself.

I suppose Sunday's Fulham/Bolton game (a 2-1 Fulham loss) could have been a highlight, except the Cottagers once again showed that complete confusion on defense is not a very solid strategy. This isn't as much as a problem at home, where they seem to have things sorted out, but once they hit the road, they seem to leave common sense behind. Questions such as "I wonder if we should mark the opposing striker?" become deep philosophical conversations that require (what seems like) minutes of pondering.

Having seen as many Fulham games (via Fox Soccer Channel) as possible this season, here's what I do know. Wayne Bridge (the left back on loan from Chelsea) is fantastic. Carlos Bocanegra is not. You might think that as a fan of American soccer that it would be hard for me to root against one of my own playing in the Premier League, but Carlos is doing a fine job of making it easy. Between himself and Zat Knight, I don't think I've ever seen two more confused players. I don't know if it's coaching or laziness (and if you both of them give up on Kevin Nolan's goal you'll know what I mean), but the thought of Carlos in a national team jersey scares the hell out of me.

Please, Bruce Arena, don't do it. Or at least leave him on the bench.

And Carlos, tuck in your fucking shirt.